Our last post discussed how to talk to your child about a divorce. We will look at how to help your children cope during and after a divorce.
Children may feel many different emotions and respond differently to a divorce. Some common emotions and ways you can help are:
- Guilt: Make sure your child knows the divorce is not their fault. Explain that if we are Christians, even when we sin, God loves and forgives us and never leaves us.
- Anxiety: Remind children that God is always in control. Study and memorize passages such as Philippians 4:4-8 together. As much as possible, keep a consistent routine.
- Behavior issues: Often, behavior issues are rooted in another emotion, so take time to get to the heart of what’s happening. Continue to love and disciple your children. Let them know that harmful or destructive behaviors are not okay but that you love and want to connect with them. Creating a structured environment with clear expectations will help.
- Regression: Younger children may need more support with things they used to be able to do independently, such as brushing their teeth.
- Withdrawing: This could be a meal at a favorite restaurant or doing an activity your child enjoys, such as throwing a ball. When a child is withdrawn, keep an eye out for deeper issues such as depression.
- Trouble focusing: Create predictable, reassuring routines at home. Keep teachers, coaches, and other caretakers in your child’s life informed about what is happening.
Only some emotions will likely be processed or surface in a single conversation. Ensure you maintain open lines of communication with your child and have ongoing conversations around their emotions. Make sure to seek professional help, such as a Christian therapist or counselor, if the situation is worsening or not resolving.
Return to the previous post here. Go to the next post here.
Chew On This:
What are some emotions your child has expressed this week?
Posted in Divorce, Family Counseling
